Does anyone have a problem of arguing with everyone in their life?
My parents hated me since I learned to talk because of this. And I started arguing with people online.
At work, no one likes me because I have strong views and argue with everyone. My friends also do not like me because of this, I kept quiet to make friends and the moment I tell my views, no one wants to hang out anymore.
In my defense, I think that everybody else is wrong. But I don’t want to argue. How do I be “normal” like everyone else and have peaceful conversations?
Netizens comments
- I guess you could try to see things from a different perspective? Like try to face the issue from others’ point of view. And don’t be so quick to disagree or disapprove someone’s view. Be cool-headed, calm and collected. All the best 🙂
- “i think that everyone is wrong” LOL
Nothing wrong with this tbh its just what you do after, are you talking down and being rude to people telling them they are wrong and you are always right? (assuming this is the case since everyone hates you lmfao) Could it also be that its not so clear as your are right and they are wrong and more that both you and the other party are right and its just a matter of perspective/understanding? Try not to look/talk down to people just because you are right, try to be more compassionate and understanding and talk to people kindly, not with a know it all attitude. Noone likes that.
- “In my defense, I think that everybody else is wrong.”
That’s the root of the problem. Nobody is correct 100% of the time, that includes you. Having an ego that isn’t humbled down gives rise to cognitive biases and makes us think we’re right all the time.
Don’t focus on wanting to be right, focus on getting it right. What that means is, treat conversations as if you and anyone who are discussing on a particular topic, are both doing so to get to the truth in a neutral way that considers both party’s points of view and objective evidences/logical thinking. Not your version of truth or their version of truth. I understand this can be difficult because not everyone has this mindset and some people just want to proof they’re right. If you think they’re wrong, don’t use labels (idiot, fool etc), don’t use directly/passive aggressive language and don’t talk over them loudly. Those only serve to set up a heated argument, not a constructive discussion.
Learning when is the right time to convey your thoughts, and doing so tactfully is important. For example, if you and your group of friends are just talking about what food tastes the best, there’s no point arguing with them over something as trivial as this. Next time you want to argue with someone, ask yourself, is starting an argument with them a productive thing to do? Or do you just want to show them you’re right to feed your ego? If you just want to feed your ego, then make yourself shut up.
There’s a saying: “Never miss an opportunity to shut up.” – Mark Twain. I repeat this quote to myself if I sense I’m going to start a foolish and meaningless argument with someone.