Adult world is all about self consciousness and alot of tolerance is needed. I didn’t knew what’s coming and i wasn’t prepared for this considering how my social skills is lacking since school days.
You don’t just walk up to someone make friends or talk to strangers like that. This isn’t school. Finding a trustable/reliable friend nowadays is luck based and getting a partner is a lottery draw for and BTO applications is another lottery.
I’m not a expert by all means and it’s just personal anecdote about it. I hope it’s practical and i just want share my thoughts in this post. This post is dedicated to anyone/myself who feels emotionally/mentally overwhelmed at any point.
I’m a 26 y/o guy, socially introverted and suffered from anxiety issues/eating disorders/insomnia before.
I stepped out of the adulthood, got a job and realised that it is just drama everyday. I’m exhausted while still learning how to cope being independant and self reliant comfortably.
Till now, I learned through awkwardness and alot of mistakes and trials so my suggestion is to all first is to be comfortable alone first as it will lead up to too much pressure in social interactions and often lead to co-dependancy. You may end up settling for toxic relationships with people who are happy to exploit your need for companionship.
I have several meetup buddies for workout and I hope to find other interests but I hope everyone has a community and a scene particular to your set of interest. Be okay with falling and picking yourself back up again. You can only acquire this skill by doing.
I learnt through observations is that reciprocally is what it matters and having ability to listen without waiting for your chance to talk about yourself is more important. I make sure that every person i’m talking to feels heard, consequential and important. In short, don’t treat everyone else as side characters in a story that’s all about you.
These claims are definitely not applicable to everyone. Exceptions do exist. I wish that making genuine friends was easier that’s all.