My 22F Girlfriend cheated on me 25M with her ex boyfriend, got pregnant and made me believe the child was mine.
I, 25yr(m) got cheated on by my 22yr(f)old girlfriend with her ex-boyfriend and she made me believe the baby she was carrying was mine. There’s a lot of events that preceded the said event of me being made to believe I was going to be a father.
I met this girl about a year and 6months ago. The r/ship kicked off nicely. She was a nice girl—at least I thought —and she was very pretty too. Our relationship was smooth sailing in the beginning although we had issues here and there like any other couple. She, was staying about 30-40mins from my place. I am already a young professional who has already finished school and kick-starting his career. She was in the course of completing her studies. So this meant she was staying at a student accommodation/ residence as they call it.
I did not have a problem with this as she would visit me regularly; almost everyweek/weekends most of the time. Things took a turn of the worst when the visits started becoming less frequent and she would always claim she is busy or whatever silly excuse she had at the time. I didn’t want to be selfish and want to have her all to myself with the little time she has to herself considering she was a student and most of her time outside of school she would spend with me. That was my mistake.
The visits became less frequent and this bothered me as time went by because I had suspicions she was starting to spend time with somebody else. However, I didn’t think too much into it as I thought oh no she is an innocent girl and would never for whatever reason do such a thing to me given how good our relationship was. Wrong!
I later discovered that she had been secretly meeting up with one of the ex boyfriends who goes to the same school as her. How I found out would need me to write another story. I confronted her about it and she had no choice but to admit it as I presented her with an overwhelming amount of evidence proving the fact. At this point I also found out they have slept together and I just wanted to know why. Why did she betray my trust like that and what led her to the said incident as I have been nothing but good to her. She insisted she was in a bad space and needed someone to talk to and one thing led to the other and she was sorry.
She told me she would understand if I cannot forgive her for this act as she is fully aware how wrong of her that was, and she would understand if I want nothing to do with her. I should have listened! I should have listened to her then. Because what is about to follow is a series of events that led to her making me believe the child she was carrying was mine.
We talked things out and she apologized and I had fully forgiven her for this as she was sincere and sorry about what she did. Fast forward to 3 months later we find out she is pregnant. Surprise! at this time she had told me that she had cut all communication with her ex boyfriend and they weren’t in contact in anyway. I later discovered that she told him about the pregnancy. However, did not tell him that she was actually in a relationship and there is a potential father of this child as she already knew what she had done. I confronted her about this and she confessed that she contacted him yes, but her reasons were that she wanted him to back off so that she can continue living her life with me who is the father of her child and partner. I gave her the benefit of the doubt.
I will now fast forward to when the baby was born and I went to visit them soon weeks after she went to labor. I spent time with them and everything was nice, we were happy that we were having a baby and I was super excited of the idea that I am now a father. There were conversations preceding her going into labor between us pertaining the paternity of the baby and I explicitly asked her; is there by any chance I am not the father of this baby. She reassured me that I am the father and I should not be worried about me not fathering the child. Also, I was not about to question a heavily pregnant woman about the paternity of what could potentially be our baby. That made me feel horrible and I stopped questioning her about this.
Coming back to when the baby was born; two months after the baby was born I later discovered that she had again rekindled her relationship with the said ex boyfriend and she was bringing the child for him to see behind my back. Mind you this guy does not know that there is already an ‘existing’ father of this baby. At this point I catch her out in the act and her whole lie is unrevealed. We fight over this and I request a DNA test done so we can finish this and rule out any uncertainty.
We continue to be a couple and raise the baby together. However, I told her it was only fair for the other alleged father to also contribute towards the maintenance of the child until all facts are on the table as I had been the one supporting them throughout her pregnancy and postpartum. This happens for a period of about 2 months before the DNA test is done.
Early this year the results came out saying I am not the father of this child. I am distraught, to say the least. I am disappointed in myself and for putting so much trust in one person who did nothing but break it, and my heart into pieces. I have since kicked them out of my place with her child and told them they can go live their happy lives with their newly found family. To be honest, this hurts me so much. I don’t go a day without thinking about them. I have already formed a solid bond with what was to be my child. Not to mention my said ex-girlfriend. All the life I knew and was preparing myself for is all gone now. I’m miserable AF.