A bunch of stories of army days were shared by netizens, here are a best that were picked.
Story 1:
We had this guy, without fail, will call our ma’am “sir”. Every single time he talked to her. Always come out one “Yes sir” or “Thank you sir” First time, the ma’am just brushed it off as she knows it’s like muscle memory. But 2nd and 3rd time, she got annoyed and started scolding him.
She got so fed up, she instructed the rest of us to make sure he gets it right, if not we all kena. So we sat him down and made him repeat simple instructions using “ma’am” instead of “sir”. And he was sure he got it already, kept reassuring us, don’t worry won’t happen again.
Next time we saw our ma’am, he damn confident. Went up to her, said loudly: “Good morning…. Mom“. I swear the whole lot of us facepalmed at the same time.
Story 2:
Encik, why we cannot book out early on Friday, you every time make us stay until 6pm so late we hungry how.
Encik: ok indent dinner every Fri from now.
Story 3
During the rifle presentation ceremony, we were supposed to shout “WITH THIS RIFLE, I WILL DEFEND MY COUNTRY!”
This blur sotong, when he got his rifle, panicked (because there were many high ranking officers and photographers watching) and shouted:
“WITH THIS RIFLE, I WILL DE.. DE.. DESTROY MY COUNTRY! No, def… DEFEND MY COUNTRY SIR! SORRY SIR!”
I was in the front row and I tried sooooo f-ing hard to control my laughter because I knew when we returned to coyline, all of us were going to kena one time good one.
I remember looking at my encik and the look of horror on his face was incredible, he was so horrified because there was a bunch of majors and LTCs around him.
We went back to coyline and faced the floor, just because one bodoh don’t know how to differentiate “defend” and “destroy”.
Story 4
“Bro you confirm holding on to the TF cap/SG pin ah?
Sotong: “Ya cfm la I check already action with squeezing grenade pouch”
Proceed to fight through the whole jungle for another mission to another location.
Summex, shag AF. Can’t wait to RTU. While returning RAI.
Sotong: “eh you got pass me the cap/ring anot ah? Can’t find leh”
Whole platoon: vulgarities
“Whole platoon go back find RAI. After that stay back to help count RAI . The rest RTU first before tonner get stuck NMT”.
Blurcock was my buddy. Unfortunately he never talked much so its more of his actions than anything else.
Story 5
This happened a long time ago so apologise if I remember certain things wrongly haha.
This happened during our time in 8SIR (A.k.a security trooper training). There was this guy of us from our platoon who wasn’t very good with English. Everytime before we have our admin time, we will have a water parade where we need to recite the ST Creed. One of the ST would need to lead in the recital. At the last sentence in the creed, the ST needs to shout :
“We Always stand our ground! never back down!”
For one of the parades, he got arrowed to by the sergeant. Even with constant guidance by the sergeant, he kept forgetting the words. At the last sentence, he shouted:
“We never stand our ground! always back down!”
Everyone was trying so hard to not laugh. The best was that guy shouted with confidence and had the smirk in his face as if he scored marksman’s.
Subsequently he was given an excuse called “Excused Complicated information”.
Story 6
We did some urban blank shooting exercises. Once we done, we need to “sumpah” that there are no more rounds left with us. We fall in and then “Bang” trigger happy finger + a round still left in this blur sotong SR21. God damn, Everyone get so terribly terrified. The Encik and platoon sergeant were discussing weather this guy should go DB straight or not? We were so sure that he is dead meat. In the end 2 weeks SOL for this guy. Another exercise, then we did the “Sumpah” again. The Sargent ask him specifically, make sure no more round on him and he say confirm. Then he got a full spot check, 2 rounds found inside his LBV. GG, this guy go in DB for 2 weeks. Damn how sotong can this guy be…