I’m (22) talking to a guy (22) right now. He’s sweet, cool, and super cute. It’s really early right now and we’re just getting to know each other. We were on FaceTime tonight and he was drinking… He got pretty drunk and pretty honest.
He then confessed to me he got drugged and raped 2 years ago at a bar. And has never told anyone about it.
I didn’t know what to say. My heart broke for him. I personally have dealt with such incidnets in the past, and molestation in my teen years. It’s a terrible feeling. His story was haunting. He told me he was at a bar, stepped into the bathroom and left his drink unattended outside.
He came back out and says he remembers nothing after that. He woke up the next morning in a strange hotel room and there was a grown man he didn’t recognize telling him to wake up. He said he was in an immense amount of pain in his lower body. And he never reported it or went to the hospital.
I don’t know what to do, or what to say. I’m not going to bring it up again unless he does first. I just told him I feel for him and I’m sorry. I urged him to tell this to his therapist & go get tested. His first answer was “I never did get tested because I’ve been scared” but then later it was “I’ve been tested since, plus the military always does physicals on us and they’d tell me if something was wrong”.
I’ve never had someone confide something like this in me. I hope I said the right things when I was comforting him. I tried to assure him it was not his fault (like he kept insisting). And just letting him know I’m here for him. We haven’t had sex yet but will soon, from the way things are going and our convos. A part of me feels nervous. And so sad for him. It was a disturbing story. Idk what I’m looking for exactly… advice? A third party opinion? I’ve never been in this predicament before and I want to make sure im not only supportive but safe as well. I like him a lot. I hate that this happened to him.