Husband (M34) of 2 years won’t get up for work on his own and when I forget (F29) we get into a fight.
My husband (M34) and I (F29) have been living together for about 6 years now and recently bought our first home. Previously we lived very close to work and didn’t have much of a commute.
We had a system where I would wake up and get ready and then he would get up after. Waking him up has always been a struggle, he is not a morning person and growing up I believe his parents woke him up a lot.
We went to school together and I know he missed a lot of class. Anyway fast forward and we kind of do this wake up struggle for last five years. Plenty of bad days but because it’s a short commute. We make it work, sometimes I would forget and he’d be late.
We have moved out now and have a longer commute to work. It’s now getting up an hour earlier for me so I can get ready, make lunches and prep coffees. I tend to get him up later, closer to our leaving for the train time. This is what he wanted because he takes less time to get ready. I don’t mind but I also like to take some time for myself before we leave and sometimes forget. We also run into a lot of “five more minutes” or snoozing his alarm a few times. Then his 30 minutes to get ready can turn into 10-20 minutes. He can make it work but he often forgets things or has to run for the train and on occasion I miss it or we both do.
Sometimes when I forget I get frantic and I wake him up quiet loudly. I will yell and scare him and this turns into a fight. I want nothing more than to have a good morning with my husband and not worry about this. I have said I don’t want to wake him up anymore but he can’t seem to get himself up.
This is not me needing to bash on my husband, he is amazing in so many ways but I just need some advice. What could we be doing differently to get a more peaceful morning for us both. Also does anyone else have this problem. We do so well in so many other areas of our life together but here is almost daily struggle.