Off late, I realized my husband has developed this super weird routine. Everyday without fail, he will disappear into the toilet for like 30 to 45 minutes, at least 2 or 3 times a day. At first, I was legit concerned, thought he got severe lao sai (diarrhea) or stomach ulcer or what. Every time I ask him, he just gives the same excuse: “Aiya, my stomach non-stop churn, feeling bloated, need to go long session.”
Then yesterday, I accidentally overheard him talking on speakerphone with his bro inside the toilet while the shower was running. He literally told his friend: “Bro, if I don’t hide inside here, she will non-stop chatter and complain about house work, work stress, and money. Toilet is the only place in Singapore got free peace and quiet.”
Wah… my heart instantly sank, then immediately standard buang (explode) with anger.
I admit, I can be quite chao chwee (big mouth / naggy) sometimes. After a long day of work, I come home, see things messy or see him just chilling on his phone, I will auto-pilot start nagging. Ask him to fold clothes, complain about my toxic boss, ask him why haven’t feed the cat, etc. But is it really until must hide in the toilet until his legs turn numb just to escape me?
It makes me feel like a total monster in my own home. But at the same time, I feel damn betrayed because instead of talking to me like adults, he choose to play pretend lao sai expert every single day. Now every time he walk towards the toilet, I just feel super bitter and rejected.
Is this normal for married life in SG? How to make him come out without me having to completely bottle up my own stress and keep quiet? Any advice on how to break this toxic cycle before our marriage completely goes down the bowl too?