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Monday, September 26, 2022


He didn’t use to be like this. We got married when we were both 25, now we’re 33 and he’s gone from around 80kg to over 200kg he has been ordering food from home every day every meal and even after meals,


Grab Food, Food Panda, Deliveroo. You named it he is probably a member or something.

Looking at him fills me with horror and despair. He may as well have been diagnosed with terminal cancer because his size is going to have the same result sometime in the next 10 years if he doesn’t stop. In my heart I no longer believe my husband will be here by the time I’m 50.

His medical problems so far:

  • A mini-stroke from a blood clot
  • Abnormal heart palpitations
  • ER visits both of those times
  • Extremely high blood pressure
  • Extremely high cholesterol
  • He had diabetes (didn’t check his levels or take insulin as directed until I began reminding him)
  • Inability to walk much (uses a scooter sometimes)
  • Joint pain
  • Lymphedema in one of his legs
  • sleep apnea and has to wear a CPAP machine at night so he won’t literally die from not breathing
  • I manage the scheduling of five different medications that he takes regularly or he wouldn’t remember/not care/I don’t know.

His diet:

  • Fast food all from Grab Food or Whatever food delivery service Mcdonald’s, Burger King, local food, KFC, popeyes, Domino’s, Dunkin donuts, pizza hut, A&W.
  • Also gets all this delivered from Grab Food whenever he feels like it, which is at least once a day. He even does it in the middle of the night.
  • Everything else is just junk food like chips and other packaged snacks. All sorts of candy. Ice cream. Baked desserts. Frozen/microwave food like breakfast trays and sausages, burrito’s, easy mac, basically anything you could find at a convenience store.
  • All his meals are full of sugar, frying oil, butter, fat and grease, just the worst ingredients that are exactly what he needs to stop eating.

We’re both WFH right now. I’ve watched him for a few days this week keeping a record of everything he ate (that I saw–if he ate at night or when I was in another room, I missed those) and then looked up the approximate caloric value of every item. Every single day was AT LEAST 10,000 calories. The worst day was a little over 14,000. A sedentary male of his age and height needs around 2500/day, just for comparison.

I. Am. Terrified… that I’m going to be burying him, possibly before we even reach our 50’s and get to enjoy old age together. I’m terrified I’m going to have to see the person I love most in the entire world die from a long, drawn out, painful accumulation of treatable illnesses. And some days I wonder if I’m not already watching that, in slow motion.

I have asked him so many times to please, please eat healthier. He will…he eats the healthy meals I make, but then he STILL eats junk food after. Or orders a second fast food dinner with Grab Food. He doesn’t get it’s not enough to combat the damage to his body.

I’ve also begged him to go to the doctor. He only goes when something is catastrophically wrong.

What should I do? Can I locked him up somewhere.

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I knew my husband since I was 20 and we were together for 10 years before we got married....
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