To start, this is about inheritance.
My father died nearly 10 years ago, he left no money to his daughters but his will says that if our mum sells the house that the money from that should be split equally between my 2 sisters and me, after mum has bought herself somewhere.
The condo is worth $1 million at least.
Now, there are 3 sisters, one has 2 condos already, the other 2 have no houses at all. The one with 2 houses says she can raise $600,000 to buy the house from mum. Mum would buy somewhere outright with $400,000 (and I think to keep some cash for a rainy day fund, which we all think is right), and give $90,000 to each sister with no houses for deposits.
These are good deposits and will be very helpful. But if mum sold the house at market value, the amount each sister with no house would get is much more.
I pointed out that this isn’t a fair split. I’ve suggested that the sister buying the house pays rent to mum the remaining percentage of the home that she hasn’t bought.
The sister who wants to buy the house ambushed me yesterday. I had a day off, no child just a day off for me. I never get time on my own, and it’s been really stressful recently so I was really looking forward to having a day to get back into a hobby I gave up 6 years ago when I had my son. But no. Sister asks if we can go out for coffee. Turns out she’s driving me 20km away to the house so we can all sit down to discuss her master plan.
On the way home, we hit traffic and I couldn’t take her chastising me for not being “grateful” for the $90k. I am grateful. But I’m also aware that the “haves” is asking the “have nots” to subsidise her lifestyle and is now asking us to be happy and grateful for it as well. It pissed me off enormously, and I got out of the car and have blocked her on everything. I think she’s asking me to give her something I can’t afford to give.
Am I the jerk for saying the arrangement on the table isn’t fair? Should I be grateful to my sister for “saving the house from strangers”? Or have I got it all wrong and it is a fair arrangement after all? Am I the devil for blocking my sister after she said I should stop focusing on what I’m not getting and focus on what I am getting ($90k)?