There is one fellow, we call him Desmond. Desmond is the definition of a SIMP (Sucker Idealizing Mediocre… you know the rest). This guy, I don’t know his brain is made of what, but he confirm got too much CPF or his father own half of Sentosa.
My wife, she is a Siam Bu—very chio, very sweet. But the whole world know she is MRS. Lim already. We post wedding photos on IG, we go BTO, we even got a fat tabby cat together. But this Desmond? He choose to be blind.
The First “Gift”
It started with one random PayNow. Suddenly my wife’s phone go ‘ding’! “Transfer received: $500.” Message: “For your lunch. Eat better don’t be so tired.”
I look at my wife. My wife look at me. “Who is this siao kia?” I ask. “The one from her old sales job lor,” she say, “Already tell him ten times I married, but he say he just want to ‘support my happiness’.”
The Strategy
At first, I was a bit buay song (unhappy). I mean, which husband won’t feel weird? But then I thought… wait a minute. This guy is literally giving us free money for doing nothing. No dates, no touchy-touchy, not even a reply most of the time.
So I told my wife: “Baby, don’t block him. Just let him ‘support’ you. Since he so want to be a philanthropist, we give him the chance.”
The “Genius” Generosity
Last month, we wanted to go Japan for holiday. Suddenly, Desmond send another message: “I saw you post about Tokyo. Must stay at good hotel, don’t suffer. Here is $2,000. Take care of yourself.”
HUAT AH! I tell you, that $2,000 paid for my Omakase and a new pair of shoes. I was eating my wagyu beef thinking: “Thank you, Desmond. You are truly the best sponsor a married couple could ask for.”
The Moral of the Story
Every time he send money, my wife just replies: “Thanks. My husband say thanks also.” Even after she mention ME, the husband, this kam gong kia still don’t give up. He probably thinks he is the main character in some K-drama where the girl eventually leaves the husband for the “kind stranger.”
But in reality? He is just our unlimited cashback credit card.
Advice for you, Bro: > If the guy want to be a clown, let him perform. As long as your wife is 100% loyal and she tell you everything, just take the money and go eat Haidilao. In this economy? A “free” sugar daddy that doesn’t get any sugar is a blessing from the heavens!
Next time he send $1k, remember to buy your wife flowers (using his money) and take her out for a nice date!