Being cast aside during lunch
I have been with this lunch group in my workplace for few years. On and off they will include me in their lunch meeting but if the group is left with just a few of us, they will find excuses not to meet.
Last time, I also found myself keep asking where they go, as their lunch plans are always decided and kept informed by each other, keeping me out of conversation (must they be this cruel? I’ve done nth wrong and have been supportive of them). Lately I’ve been cast aside for real.
None of them bother to contact me and left me behind to go for lunch when they are seated next to me. I am quiet as I let them do talking cos they love to do so cos when I talk they usually dont really listen or they dont find my joke to be funny, always giving me serious ans.
I am an introvert but that doesn’t mean I like being left alone during lunchtime when everyone is out with their clique. Cos at my workplace, if one is found alone, he/she is easily judge and left a bad impression. People will think you are anti-social or being cast aside cos u no good.
So I never want to lunch alone and I also prefer to talk to people during lunch. I find it harder to find a new clique cos people might ask me why do I not join the old clique, what happened blabla. Last time my colleagues from other clique did ask me out for lunch but I was loyal to this clique and want build relationship so I just stick to it. It was a wrong choice for me back then.
How do I approach new clique to join them? I’ve been so dreadful of lunchtime and it gives me anxiety and depression. This is not the first time people cast me aside for nothing. I’ve been dealing with this since my grow up years despite me wanting to mix around. I am a sincere person who listen to whatever they talk and I do talk as well, but people just aint interested even just to include me in their lunch. Whatsmore it’s a group of people who dont include me suddenly, ignoring me, as if I have no feelings.
I always treat them like friends or good colleagues, yet they want to treat me that way. Like I said, we are just colleagues and I dont expect more, just lunch and joining of org events in a group together. Is it so difficult? What to do?