I got so damn lonely I hired a escort to drink with me
I just wanted to have someone to talk to and drinking alone makes me feel like an alcoholic. I’ve been isolating myself since I was injured in an accident that left me scared from head to toe and it left my face heavily scarred and my torso front and back.
I’m thinking about talking to a psychiatrist and maybe trying to become normal again but in the last 9 years I have socialized with maybe 4 people and that was probably less than 100 times all together which sounds like a lot till you spread it across 9 years.
As you can tell I’ve become anti social, bit of a recluse one could say. I used to go out and people used to stare at me or ask me about my scars and I don’t know why it bothered me so much.
Funny story just to show how interested people are in them, I once got 10 plus matches on a dating site just because they were curious of how I got the scars on my face. Hell, I can’t blame them I’d probably wonder too and possibly even stare
Since Covid I have been able to socialize a lot more though since mask were widely acceptable and that paired with glasses covered most of them
Yesterday though I actually broke down and hired an escort just to have someone to talk to at my hotel bar and for the first time in my life I felt normal again.
I hired her for 1 hour but she ended up staying 7 more hours with me till last call. It was sad to hear she also had similar trauma as I but also nice to see someone else could relate though that was not my intentions.
The experience gave me a new sense of confidence, like I can be normal and that I can over come this. Sounds stupid I know but I just wanted to talk a little bit about my night yesterday and today I’m going to a barbecue with my friend and a bunch of his buddies. Maybe this is the turning point for me