Not Your Cinderella Kind of Story
I’ve been working here in Singapore as a domestic helper for a decade now. I am an unwed single mom with a teenage son. During my first five years here, I met a local Singaporean guy. We became a couple, but it lasted for just a year. It ended abruptly when I found out he was going to marry someone his parents had chosen for him.
Yes, an arranged marriage. Why? Because I am a helper, and she works a corporate job earning more than him. I am a single mom, and she is single with no baggage. I was financially unstable, and she came from a well-off family both here and in her home country.
It was devastating. What hurt most was that my ex and his family assumed I just wanted to use him as an ATM—even though, throughout our entire relationship, I never asked him to spend on me. We split every single bill. I have raised my son completely on my own without asking for hand-outs. I’m no hypocrite; of course we need money, but needing money doesn’t mean I refuse to work or want to leech off someone else.
Despite the heartbreak, I kept my composure and chose to take the high road. We parted ways as friends, though we eventually cut off communication out of respect for his new marriage.
Fast forward to recently—nearly four years after our breakup. He contacted me out of the blue, venting about the reality of his married life. He told me that even though his wife earns a lot, they have zero savings. The reason? She lives like she’s still single. She is always out drinking with friends, buying luxury clothes and bags, and refuses to have children because she’s terrified of being stuck at home and ruining her hourglass figure.
My response to his rant? Silence. I just listened. Honestly, I didn’t even know what to say. Hearing from him has brought back old feelings, and a part of me realizes I’m still in love with him. But the rational side of my mind is screaming no. It’s wrong. He is a married man, and I need to permanently move on.
I used to think these plotlines only existed in movies, but it happened to me. I’m no relationship expert, but if I’ve learned anything from this, it’s that financial status and background don’t guarantee a good partner. Check the mindset. Always check the mindset.