My boyfriend (32m) wants me (31f) to move in with him but is 40k in debt
Am I crazy to move in with him? For reference, I live comfortably on my own. If I moved in with him, I would save about 400 dollars or more a month essentially “paying cheaper rent” to him rather than what I pay to my current landlord.
This way I get cheaper rent and he gets money to help pay off his debt.
I do love him and see a future with him, however it’s only been 9 months of dating. It’s not a thing of feeling sorry for him, but financially it’d be comfortable for him and even more for me.
EDIT
since there’s been a lot of questions on regards to what the debt is from I thought I’d add it here for clarity. It is a 40k line of credit, half (maybe more) of that was home renovations, some was car expenses he couldn’t afford up front.
he does have some loans (not sure if that affects the line of credit, I’m smart with my money just don’t know a ton about these kinds of things) and the rest is just miscellaneous spending over the last 5 years.
No gambling, no addiction. Nothing like that. Just not the smartest decisions/could have made better ones.
Netizens’ comments
- Give it some more time and pay attention to his spending habits. Tell him you are open for the idea but not quite there yet.
- You don’t sound like you’re ready to move in with him TBH. If his debt worries you, it could help to have a conversation about how he intends to pay it off and when, because if you stay together it could get in the way of your plans as a couple.
- It may look good on paper to move in but what about when he starts asking you to “loan” him money for this bill or that item? Money that you’re never going to get back because either you “live there too” or “but don’t you love me?” So the money you think you’ll be saving…you really won’t be saving anything but actually spending more. Before you argue this point remember that he’s 40K in debt. How do you he got that way? Is it all school loans or is it credit cards? Gambling? Think about whatever it is.
You’re only nine months in. I’d wait and see if this is going to be a long term relationship or not before making such a commitment.