being broke is expensive
I am SO tired of hearing about everyone around me doing amazing things and getting their life together. I make a decent wage for 2010 (around 17) but not in 2023 and live paycheck to paycheck due to bills and debt (this is because of my budget that I stick to) .
I’m only 22. I came from a broke family and life is just so incredibly expensive. I can’t even live on my own right now which does not help my mental health because my roommates are my parents.
Sometimes I just want to die so I don’t have to deal with it. and that is so WILD to me. That money is causing another form of darkness within me. I am. EXHAUSTED.
My supervisor saw me looking into my bank account (mind you I got paid 2 days ago and he knew this) and I am already in the negative $22. He said that’s bs and was gonna send me the money to not be in the negative but I felt like that was such a handout and refused it.
He still sent me $5 and even told his supervisor and his supervisor felt bad and tried to give me what cash he had on him. Like… I know I don’t make as much as them and I know my life is messed up but that felt so embarrassing.
Up until this point no one has known my financial situation nor home situation and now I just want to cry. I don’t want handouts because I’m pitied. I just want to be able to do things like a normal adult I need a higher up job that I have been promised for months which seems to be happening soon but it doesn’t.
I cant find any other jobs and I am trying to go back to school but can’t afford the tuition so I CAN get a better higher-paying job. I feel so stuck all because I don’t have money. I don’t even know what to do and I hate asking for money because I already owe my parents $10k.
Edit to add: YES i have a VERY frugal budget I stick to and I manage my money to the best of my abilities.