I told my brother that if he proposed to my ex-girlfriend, I wouldn’t show up to the wedding or speak to him ever again?
My older brother is in a serious relationship with a woman who I dated. They have been together for three years. Prior to that she and I had dated for 5 years.
We were poly school sweethearts, and I was deeply in love with her. She dumped me seemingly out of nowhere and about 3 weeks later they went on their “first” date, she was in a relationship with my older brother. I have no proof of overlap. I have no proof that she was talking to him at the same time as she was dating me. Honestly, I didn’t want to look for the proof as I didn’t want to damage our relationship over a girl however, I think it’s pretty obvious. This feeling has been in my mind for years and part of me resents them for it. I also feel kind of betrayed that my older brother would shack up with a girl who dumped me while I was still trying to get over her.
This week, my brother announced that he was going to propose to her. Everyone in my family was happy for him except me. I couldn’t be. He is marrying someone who I saw myself marrying for years because he picked her up while I wasn’t looking. I tried to hide it but I couldn’t suppress it anymore. After I got the news, I called my brother and gave it to him straight. I told him that I couldn’t be happy for him and that I couldn’t let this be a part of my life anymore. I told him that if he proposes to her I won’t be at his wedding because I will no longer consider him my brother. He will be a stranger to me.
He was upset. He told me that I need to get over the past and that if she wanted to be with me, she wouldn’t have left me for him in the first place. He said that I was being immature and making his proposal and his relationship all about me. I felt like I was being pretty generous with this.
All of my family is mad at me and is on his side. They all think I’m jealous and just looking to start a fight over this girl. I don’t want to cause drama, if he wants to propose that’s his decision and I will make mine.