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Tuesday, December 6, 2022
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MAN LEFT HIS GF FOR HIS EX TWICE, NOW BEGGING HER FOR ANOTHER CHANCE

He ghosted me for his ex TWICE and now begs for another chance.

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I (29F) started dating A (26M) early February. I thought we were doing really well and sparks flew between us. It seemed so perfect until he suddenly ghosted me in April. Turned out he got back with his ex and that they were still talking behind my back the entire time.

I was confused and heart broken. It was so perfect and I never really thought this could happen. I started moving on with my life when he suddenly came back into my life and persistently begged me to take him back. He said she was his first relationship and they were together for 8 years (she cheated on him) and something came over him and he thought he had to give it another go.

After several weeks of him apologizing, I decided to give it another chance. We picked up track and it seemed to have been going great. I met his family, we spent every single day together. We were so happy, planning trips, joking, laughing etc.

One day he told me I wasn’t the same person anymore and that I turned very insecure. He said he needed a break. I was lost and confused because we were doing so great. He asked for space and I gave it. I then got a call from this guy who told me that A had followed his ex girlfriend’s car to her hookup buddy’s house and created a whole scene. I grabbed my car keys and drove to the location that the guy texted me.

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I reached there only to find A there with her. I went up to him and asked him what was going on. He said he couldn’t do this with me. That he loves her and cant live without her. That he was sorry but it was her he wanted.

I felt like an idiot but I wished them the best and left. During this time I found out he always denied having a relationship with me, told her we’re just friends and that they still met and kissed behind my back.

This was in September. In October, he started contacting me again. Told me he loves me and that she manipulated him to get back with her. I said no and blocked him. He ended up outside my office and threatened suicide. I got worried and started talking to him. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY I STARTED PROVIDING EMOTIONAL SUPPORT TO HIM.

I made it clear that I dont want to get back with him because I am so traumatized and cant trust him but he is so persistent and swears up and down that he loves me more than I could imagine and that he will harm himself if I didnt get back with him.

He promises to let me but starts contacting me again from fake profiles etc. and guilts me into talking to him. I feel so trapped. Am I being too harsh? His parents told me they have never seen him so shattered and that he is being genuine. My parents and friends dont want to see his face.

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How do I stop feeling this guilt? Everytime he cries, I find it my responsibility to make him feel better. I dont know what’s wrong with me. I already know I dont want him back.

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