My nerves were on high alert. I was on my very first date with this gorgeous girl I had been talking to for weeks.
We had finally decided to meet up and I was determined to make a lasting impression. I had picked out my nicest shirt and my favourite white pants, practised every conversation topic I could think of and was ready to show her my best self.
We made our way to the restaurant and I was doing my best to appear confident and cool. I resorted to my usual small talk, but it felt a bit forced and I was worried that I was coming off as too nervous.
After a few minutes of awkward conversation, our food arrived and I was relieved to have something else to focus on.
I began to eat my burger and noticed that it was a bit spicier than I had anticipated. I started to feel a bit of a rumble in my stomach and I knew that I had to be careful. I started to eat slower and hoped that the feeling would pass.
Unfortunately, my hopes were in vain. As I was taking my last bite of the burger, I felt a pressure in my stomach that I couldn’t ignore. I knew I had to act fast, so I took a deep breath, stood up, and told my date that I had to use the restroom.
I scrambled to the bathroom as quickly as I could, but as soon as I got there, it was too late. I had accidentally let out a loud fart, and it was one of the loudest ones I had ever heard. I was horrified and couldn’t believe my luck. I knew that I had to get out of there fast, so I rushed out of the bathroom, only to find that I had left a trail of ‘chocolate sauce’ on my white pants.
I was mortified. I had no idea what to do. I knew that my date had heard the noise cause the restaurant was tiny, but I had no idea if she had seen the ‘chocolate sauce’ on my pants. I wanted to make a quick escape, but I also didn’t want to appear too suspicious. Ultimately, I decided to just act normal and play it cool.
I made my way back to the table and apologized for taking so long in the restroom. I tried to act as if nothing had happened, but I could sense that my date was suspicious. She didn’t say anything, but I could tell that she was trying to figure out what had happened. I was so embarrassed that I wanted to die.
We finished the rest of the date in awkward silence, and all I wanted to do was go home and forget the whole thing. As soon as I got home, I changed my clothes, took a shower, and just tried to forget about the whole embarrassing experience.
I never did go on a second date with that girl, and I’m sure she figured out what had happened. To this day, I can’t believe I was so clumsy and made such a mistake on my very first date. I guess I’ll never know what could have happened if I hadn’t farted so loudly and gotten ‘chocolate sauce’ all over my white pants.