She was hiding the fact she is an alcoholic and constantly drunk, I grew to care about her a lot.
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I unknowingly fell in love with a drunk basically.
I got her some help and her drinking has reduced significantly. The problem is the difference in her personality is night and day.
The sober her is a very boring person, it’s like talking to the wall.
I don’t enjoy being with her when she is sober. I also know if I leave she will start drinking.
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Any advice? Should I leave?
Here are what netizens think:
- Reduced significantly is not the same as sober. I can only speak from my experience but I was so much worse as an addict trying to reduce my intake and things finally made more sense once I quit for good. Any amount of drinking puts me back in that cycle and the only way to stop was to not start again.
- If she’s full sober, things just take time to adjust and learn better coping mechanisms. For me, I drank heavily and hid it for 20 years, those habits don’t just erase themselves because you stop drinking.
- You need to do what’s best for you and if the relationship isn’t working out then you shouldn’t stay. Focus on the issues of why the relationship isn’t working (or what does work) and stay away from sober vs not sober when you communicate with her about it.