My wife (27F) got a tattoo and I (29M) am inexplicably furious when I look at it or her now. Where do I go for help?
This is so beyond my character and it’s so stupid but the emotions are real and they’re out of control.
I’ve been having panic attacks into the months leading up to it every time its mentioned, but I soldiered on thinking I would get used to it.
She got it yesterday and now any time I see her, and doubly so if I see that thing, I feel nothing but pure contempt, hatred, and resentment.
I’ve had to completely remove myself from the household for the time being or I risk doing something stupid. This isn’t like me at all and i have no idea what’s going on. It’s just a tattoo!
I love her so much, and she loves it and I want to be happy she’s happy but instead I feel no love or even care for her when I’m in the same room. I’m scared of myself.
I’m just looking for some perspective on what I should do. I recognize how messed up my own head must me right now, and how stupid this is.
This isn’t me. I want myself back. I’ve already cut some deep verbal wounds because I want her to hurt, we separate rooms I calm down, realize how stupid I’m being, go to apologize, and my blood is boiling again when I see her.
I need help but I don’t know what help I need. Please, any direction on where to go or what to do.
I’m prepared to be crucified. I deserve it. I am the bad guy here.