My son is product of my ex’s affair
I’m raising an 8 year old boy who is not my bio kid. My ex-wife cheated on me and got pregnant. She wasn’t sure if it was mine because she was on birth control.
When he turned two, it became obvious that he wasn’t mine and my marriage was over. My ex tried to shut me out of his life but over the years I got physical custody and she pays me child support.
For all purposes he is my son emotionally and legally. I don’t think he knows how he was sired. We do not look alike and it’s becoming more obvious as he gets older.
He looks like his bio father. It kills me how hurt he will be if and when he finds out. He will because he’s very into science and asks questions about his heritage.
I try to smother him with as much love as possible and hope he’s not too hurt by everyone not telling him the truth.
Netizens’ comments
- A dad is the person who raises you into a man. Not the one that made you. Kudos to you bro. You’re a great man.
- I’m adopted, and I have to urge you to tell him as soon as you can. It is much better to know this and grow up knowing it rather than find out when your in your 20s or 30s…so many options may be unavailable to him at that point, and it’s such a shock…
At 8, you can tell him and he’ll understand slowly. It won’t be nearly as big of a deal. He’ll just know that he’s loved and taken care of, you can explain this to him on terms that you both are comfortable with right now, and you can explain to him that nothing has to change. I really cannot stress to you enough how much better it will be than if he finds out later in life, and especially if not by you, but by someone out of anger or hate.
Good luck.