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Friday, June 21, 2024
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MANAGING HOUSEHOLD CHORES IN A MARRIAGE, “NOTHING IS EVER FAIR”

Hi everyone!

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Is household chores a thing that married couples regularly argue about?

We both work FT, but my husband works longer hours as compared to me. We discussed on the main chores to be done and I had decided I should take up more % of household chores. However, my husband is not doing the remaining tasks delegated to him.

When he’s at home, I see him watching shows instead of doing the chores that he has to do, that could be left undone for days or weeks depending on what chore it is. This has made me feel frustrated because our shared space is also in a mess. I understand everyone needs to unwind after work but so do I? If I start picking up his chores, I might as well do everything myself. I only recently started to feel the tiredness of having to maintain the entire house and now I feel like if this doesn’t get resolved, I also don’t want to have kids because it’s just gonna add to the amount of things I need to do myself.

We did talk about this issue quite often, but it’s either ending up with 1. me giving up on reasoning out because he is busy and tired from work and I really understand he work longer hours than me, or 2. He gets annoyed and does the household chores. Which either is tiring.

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On the topic of chores, side/small chores that we don’t mention explicitly such as clearing out expired food from the fridge, cleaning the exterior of the fridge when there’s visible water/milk/coffee stain, then all these are really never done. Things like that are always a mental load for me until I had the energy to do such tasks. How do I unload that off me?

Send help, or advice, thanks

*cries*

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