My (38m) wife (35f) said my name while hooking up with a guy from her gym
My wife and I have been together for 9 years. Married for six and have a 3 year old daughter. I work from home and she is a stay at home mom and wife.
the gym she goes to has classes everyday at noon and she goes To one every day.
So this past weekend our daughter was going to spend a few days with her grandparents. They come to pick up up Friday morning and we all hang out for a bit.
When they leave my wife goes to the gym and says she will need to run some errands afterwards. That was normal so I didn’t think anything of it.
I’m self employed and have a home office and a general rule is that when the door to my office is closed I shouldn’t be disturbed except if it’s and emergency.
So I’m working with the door closed and I hear my wife come home early then I expected. I hear her use the toilet and it sounded like she stopped outside my office but didn’t knock.
Then I hear her run back to the toilet. My first guess was a stomachache or food poisoning or something. I leave my office and hear her dry heaving in the toilet.
After knocking to make sure she is ok I bring some water and she is lying on the bed and I was convinced she was sick because she looked terrible.
But then she told me what happened. Apparently she had met this guy at the gym and they had started flirting at first but today was the first day she had gone to his place.
Instead of going to the gym she went to see him. They started making out and getting undressed and while she admits to using her hand on him she swears there was no penetration of any kind.
He started kissing her neck and she said my name. That started some chaos and she left quickly and came straight home.
She showed me messages of how he started texting her almost as soon as she left and a lot of his comments seem to confirm her story. he asks about her saying my name and says how this wasn’t how there first time was supposed to go etc.
I think I can believe her that she stopped the situation before it went all the way. in the heat of the moment I told her if she wants any chance of working this out she needs to say to him in no uncertain terms they are over and has to quit the gym.
She did both without hesitation. I regret my choice of words because it made seem like we would definitely work this out.
its only been a few days but I’m not sure I want to reconcile but then I think about our daughter. She seems really remorseful but I’m just not sure what steps to take now. What advice or suggestions do people have?