Dear men, what is something us women do that baffles you?

• How they don’t dress for the occasion. They dress for the arrival. And then after 5 minutes they aren’t comfortable.
• How you all manage to sit with a phone in your back pocket
• Always baffles me just how much they share with their friends lol especially around intimate matters in the bedroom. As someone who’s worked with a lot of women there’s a few times they had me straight blushing, and I’m far from a prude lol. They think guys always talk about it but usually ours is limited to “yeah we hooked up, yeah it was good”
• Take whatever time you need to get ready whether it be 30 minutes or 3 hours, then rush us when we’re about to leave to put our shoes on
• When a woman says she was into me a while back, but is not anymore because I didn’t make a move when she was communicating her interest through extremely subtle and undetectable signals. I can’t read your mind. If you’re interested, just tell me.
  The signs, hints, signals all look like you’re just being nice and want to be friends. I can’t interpret your desires, just tell me
• Being mad at me for something “I” did in your dreams.
• Talk like we’re sitting in a library and then get mad when I couldn’t hear what you said
• “What’s wrong babe?”
  “Nothing…..”
  “No really, something is obviously bothering you, just tell me baby.”
  “I said nothing…”
  *Later that night you get a text:
  “I can’t believe you didn’t even try to comfort me tonight. Something was obviously bothering me and you just went on like nothing was up, asshole. I can’t believe you”
• Speaking with subtext and implications. Girls think they’re being obvious, but it’s really difficult picking up on their attempts to communicate.
• you’re willing to spend an eternity in a shop you like and complain at me when i say i’m ready to go, but if it’s one i like i better be ready to drop everything and leave when you say you want to
• You’re allowed to be mad about something without us being mad about it but when we get mad about something you feel the need to also get mad but then direct it towards us.
• When you’re ordering food and you ask if they want some, and they say no. And you ask if they are sure, cause you’re happy to buy them some, and they say no. And then they want just a bite of yours which turns into three bites and now you’re a jerk because you don’t want to share.