My wife is the breadwinner. I’m a househusband doing online business for past years so earnings is up and down. So I do housework and cook (I happen to be a pretty ok cook) and take care of a wife after a long day of work. But her mother was very unhappy coz she subscribed to gender norms so in the end I also stay out of her family gatherings. I also stay away from her family coz her sisters quite money face and think I’m useless as a househusband.
My wife has an ex whom she left for me. The ex was not as rich as me till I decided to become home husband coz after marriage I decided to build a business and my wife was supportive of my ambition. But yeah recent times are bad.
my wife’s mother and family seem to love this ex from day 1, coz this ex always driving nice cars and buy all of them dinner always.
Last week, her ex jio my wife for birthday celebration just both of them, they always do it for years but I never bother for many years coz she is a responsible wife and I trust her. But this time he invited my wife’s mother too and according to my wife they had a good time. I had never on good terms with her mother since I decided to quit a regular job. it felt like my wife also enjoyed it.
I can’t a but feel weird. But I also think it’s because my income drop. I don’t have dignity tbh and I regret everything I made about my career. What should I do to make myself better? Please be honest and shoot me if you want.
Here are what netizens think:
- I’m just puzzled that your wife goes for her birthday meals with her ex every year. What’s the reason that you allow this to happen? Do they have children together? If they don’t, then I think this is a huge red flag of them keeping the bridge between the 2 of them open JUST IN CASE… It’s happening under your nose and you’re letting it happen. Also why did you quit your full time job? You could’ve done your business part time for a few years first and wait for it to be fully successful before quitting
- 1. It’s odd to allow your wife to meet her ex every single year without anything happen.2. You trust your wife but do you trust her ex ?3. It’s doesn’t make any sense for a past relationship to continue till today4. I am pretty sure they might have something more that u didn’t noticed.
- 1. Your wife is the bridge to the relationship between her mom and you. So she can be the key to how her family views you. Is she doing enough to change their perception? (I dont think she should let her mom join the birthday celebration, it is odd. and even let her ex to conveniently meet every year. Why. You. Let. Her?)2. I think you should not stay away from her family 100%, and should also do your part to build relationship with her family even in smaller efforts. It could be hard but your wife can help, if she wants to help.3. Even if you make less money you can also buy things for her family. No need to be too expensive. And even cook for her family occasionally. Just do what you can do.4. When you dine out with your wife, invite her mom along too (3 people). And sometimes, invite her sister (3 people). And sometimes, invite everyone. Not forgetting just yourself and the wife, like a monthly date.5. There is nothing wrong being a house husband if that works well for the two, especially you also do your own business. The in laws may look down on you, but you dont look down on yourself, which you may start feeling so. However, if a business is not working or things have changed, it is time to re-strategise the whole thing.6. Remember, she chose you. (Pika~) Show to her that she didnt choose wrongly.