Hello:
I will like to get some advice regarding my family problem. If you have toxic family members too, please share with me on how do you deal with them.
I am the only child turning 40 soon. I am living with my single mum. She’s never been married. She told me she hated my existence as I reminded her of my father. She wanted to abort me but she was being stopped by her siblings and her parents. After finding out I am a girl from her GP session she hated me all the more. She always told me girls are the useless things in this world.
Just recently I got engaged to my fiance. She told me I will only get married on my funeral because I do not have the finances for marriage. I have difficulty talking and I never last long on a job. Maybe this is unbelievable to you all, but I can get fired from 3-4 jobs in a month. I just got fired today bcos I can’t answer a passer-by. The passerby called up my agent and complaint about me. This job role is a roadside cleaner. If you guys want to know how serious it is, I even have difficulty ordering food. Hawkers will shoo me away, especially during peak hours.
My mum looked down on me for being an almost mute girl. Daily she will open my bedroom door and call me a stupid girl, etc.. and she keeps comparing me to my male cousin who’s a police officer. She said I don’t even earn $10000 per month so I don’t deserve to live. For every job I worked at, she will demand 50% of my salary. 90% of my life I wished I am hearing-impaired, at least I won’t get to hear her.
My fiance is a loving 30s++ man. He’s a businessman and well to do. He’s always asking me not to worry about money, approach him when i am stress etc.. but I really hated relying on him. Reason was his role isn’t a relaxing one, he’s out in the rain and sun whole day meeting clients. His family treated me as family and I loved them a lot. They taught me what is family love.
I feel that he deserves a normal girl, who is pretty and rich. Am I selfish to keep holding on to him despite my disability?
Life is harsh in SG. There are no support for speech problems here.