Picture Source: Tiny Buddh
I have faced with a break up a while ago. Will just like to share some of the things I have learned and vent out my bottled feelings at the same time. You may or may not agree, but I still hope it will provide some valid pointers:
1. Just so you may already know, in every relationship, fights will happen, arguments will take place. However, do not brush issues aside and do not drag them for a long time, resolve them immediately, before you all go to sleep. Let your partner knows if you have any unresolved concern and work it out together as a couple. It is irresponsible to snowball things on your own and then eventually throw them at your partner when you think the relationship is beyond repair. Things will end ugly that way, let’s not do that. I believe your partner would have his/her fair share of merits too.
2. Accept the fact that things will get habitual and become mundane after a period of time into the relationship (I guess roughly after the one year mark?). Both parties have to be prepared for that — things ain’t be gonna sweet and happy all the time. Therefore, try to inject some surprises for your partner now and then. It can be something small or something minor, it doesn’t matter. It is the thoughts and sincerity that matter, I guess?
3. Make the effort to pay attention to your partner’s needs. Don’t be a snob and simply brush away your partner’s requests. I am not referring to just sexual needs. Even simple basic things such as wanting to go to a place for a meal or trying out a new sport, attend to them. Make time, make the effort to do these activities with your partner. Don’t just brush these requests away because it may be not your main interest or you are “too busy”. You are actually neglecting your partner when you do that. Nobody likes to feel neglected.
4. It sounds obvious, but always remember to communicate. A compatible couple should find it easy to communicate about almost anything. Let your partner knows what is happening in your life, listen to his/her response, discuss things together and let your partner knows what is your final stand. Don’t just think everything on your own and keep everything to yourself, your partner may feel isolated and unappreciated. If he/she is the right one, you two should be able to
5. Everytime you feel super unhappy or pekcek, stop talking and take deep breathes. It is easy to say something nasty during a fight, but just like how you can’t pick up spilt milk, you can’t take back what you have said/typed. Learn to take a step back, give each other the space to think things through and calm down before talking things out. Also, choose your words carefully because words can hurt. A lot.
All these are difficult things to be done, but trying to mend hurt feelings is a lot harder. Don’t hurt the people you love. So that is it. Sorry for the long post. You may think this is a troll, bullshit, naïve. Maybe. I am just sharing. Feel free to comment more on it. I’ve made my mistakes and they have cost me my relationship. Maybe. I am just sharing. Feel free to comment more on it. I’ve made my mistakes and they have cost me my relationship. There isn’t one day I am not regretting about what have happened. Every day I am earnestly wishing there can be a second chance, but unfortunately, life doesn’t work that way.
So I hope there won’t be many more people following my footsteps. If you are single, relationship IS a rocket science, be prepared. If you are in a relationship, cherish your loved ones well, don’t take them for granted. I certainly still love my ex a lot, but all I can do now is hope that my ex is doing well and will continue to do better. To the one who once loved and the one I truly love, do take care of yourself. With us moving on with our lives separately, I really hope our paths will cross once again. I miss you.
I certainly still love my ex a lot, but all I can do now is hope that my ex is doing well and will continue to do better. To the one who once loved and the one I truly love, do take care of yourself. With us moving on with our lives separately, I really hope our paths will cross once again. I miss you.
Source:NUSWhisper