NEW STAFF NO FRIENDS AT WORK, WHOLE DAY NEVER TALK TO ANYONE & EATS ALONE

Lunch with colleagues?

Who do you guys eat with during lunchtime while in office? With a work bestie? Your team? Random office people? Alone?

I’m finding it so awkward to be always left alone during lunchtime (I’m new). Even if someone asks me out of courtesy but very close to lunchtime, I will reject. Just some anxiety over them knowing that if they didn’t invite me, I’d be eating lunch alone.

Just think it’s quite pointless to have to WFO on some days, but I can spend the whole day practically not speaking to a single person while in office. Might as well permanent WFH where I’ll be much happier and not realise how much of a loser I really am.

Netizens’ comments

1. Usually if im new i will just go along whoever asked me. It’s just to know company culture, welfare etc. if it’s other department then they will probably share their opinions of my boss.
2. Pluck up some courage and just say yes the next time you’re asked – before everyone stops asking because you’ve rejected everyone. Social anxiety is normal especially in new enviroments but do make the effort to get to know your colleagues a bit.
3. Having lunch alone is fine. Nothing wrong with that.
   HOWEVER your reason for rejecting is concerning. There’s an underlying insecurity and misplaced self-consciousness.
   When they invite you, there is no hidden judgement if you accept. They are NOT thinking “lol this person say yes? Must be damn loser sia would’ve eaten alone if not for us”. It is your own insecurity being projected onto them. The invite likely comes from a place of friendliness and inclusiveness.
   You are trapped in a vicious cycle because you reject lunch invites and end up eating alone, but at the same time you think that others judge you for eating alone. Only way to escape this cycle that you trapped yourself in is to accept the invites and give it a shot.
   You never know, maybe you’ll hit it off and click with them, or at least have a decent pleasant lunch.
4. OP am confused as heck. I don’t think having lunch alone defines a person as a loser – you may wanna look into that.
   it all depends on your company’s culture. for me, it’s either with my team mates, boss, other teams / department or alone.