I have 4 siblings in total, and we’re all doing comfortably financially. My parents are also pretty comfortable. My mom doesn’t work and my dad is still working although he can retire. He doesn’t want to as he said he gets bored.
What I can’t stand about my parents is… they just don’t want to pay for things they want to buy. They have money, but they want us to pay for them. We already give them about $2.5k of allowance every month in total.
On top of that, if they want anything.. for example, renovate their home (for no practical reason, more of aesthetics) they want us to pay for it. We have paid for what they want a few times (renovate kitchen, renovate toilet)… but now it becomes a habit. Everytime they want something, they want us to pay for it. They wanted to install new ceiling fans recently and also asked us to pay for it. My mom recently found out that i hired a part time helper for my home, then she started hinting to me that she also wants a part time helper for her home and she wants me to pay for it. With the VTL opening, they mentioned they want to go to europe holiday (est 10k per person) and they also asked us if we can pay for it.
It’s not like my parents cannot afford these things that they want, they CAN afford it.. But they want us to pay for it. I don’t understand why? My dad even said to me, “to you all $500 is nothing since your salary so high. To me $500 is a lot.” But wtf, i am only earning slightly higher than my dad (10% more).. and although we are comfortable, all of us have kids and we still have to save up for our own kids. Plus, even though my older siblings earn double than me, it is unfair for them to keep paying for whatever my parents want just because they want it.
Talking to them is difficult, they will probably just say that we are being stingy with our money and don’t want to spend on them. Sigh. Any advice?
Netizens’ comments
- Then tell them their money dont use then keep for what? Also cannot bring into coffin when they die? Dont give in to them. Once or twice is fine, but if they cannot draw the line and call you all stingy, you draft out the expenses and tell them you have a family to support and retire too.
- When they decided to have 5 kids, my guess is that your parents already planned to have all of you serve as their “CPF Life”.
Were they also as equally generous to all of you when you were a kid? If so, just treat this as “repayment” for that previous generosity.
- You know why people loves money? Because they get to call the shots.
If your parents insists on the kids paying full, then the kids get to call the shots…Want walls to be white? No….you want to get it black.
Want bright lights, No…Make it dim…You pay for it, you decide how it will look.
Not happy? Then get them to contribute.
I don’t believe in giving people things for free (yes even parents). They need to have skin in the game in order to appreciate and don’t take things for granted.
That’s what I will do