On the giving parents 1.2k rant.
I have to do a submission in order to comment because my entire “family” is on my fb.
I have the same toxicity family as you. And mind you, giving money is the least of my worry. I still have to do entire household chores taking turns with my sister while my own dad is watching youtube and mom playing phone games.
When i was still under one roof with them it was nightmare every day. I had to bug my bf to hurry up marry me and get me out of there.
I was very stupid for me to tell them my salary of 3.6k back then and i started buying them gifts. And the ball dropped on me when they wanted allowance of $500 because they saw how well to do I am. On top of that, i have to pay for my mom’s shopping spree on lazada and taobao because “i dont know how to do online payment”. I damn regretted teaching her and showing her the good deals available. It is really bad during the 11/11 whatever sales.
So here’s the thing on how i escape from these sick “parents” who treated me as an investment.
I stayed more in my bf’s house, saying that it was nearer to workplace. I eventually got married, got my bto, 2 kids. I told my parents that im not paying them anything other than cny angbao. I have my own life to handle, bills to pay myself and guess what i asked for money from them. They dodge me all the way.
I mean i heck care. They went to manipulate my relatives saying how useless am i. They even refuse to take care of my bb. Refuse to help in house reno. Whatever. I do it myself with my husband & his family. And i never regret this move ever since. Honestly its good riddance since they are out of my life and waiting for me to fail. But i show them success and happy without them.
To any boomers who are about to comment how unfilial am i, think again.
If my parents didnt demand harshly, i would have spent lavishly on them, bring them out on holidays, more family time spent. But they made the whole thing so sour, spoil my image to all the relatives and friends, refuse to help in my confinement, playing with my kids, i think this is what strike the balance. Force me until i simply dont care anymore.