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Singapore
Friday, February 3, 2023
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ROOMMATE DOESN’T SHOWER & WEARS SAME CLOTHES SEVERAL DAYS IN A ROW, STARTING TO SMELL

My friend has horrible hygiene and I don’t know how to tell him

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Our friends all live in the same unit. Him and I especially get along really well, but the problem is that he stinks. Bad.

He doesn’t shower regularly, sometimes wears the same clothes multiple days in a row, and he generally doesn’t take care of personal hygiene.

Our other friends have also picked up on this, and we care about him and want him to do better, but we don’t know how to tell him.

In the past, if we gave him any constructive criticism or advice, he would shut down and refuse to talk to us for sometimes days on end.

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And he won’t even take our advice to heart. To many of us it seems like he doesn’t want to change. Some have actually started to give him hints about his smell, by getting air fresheners for the dorm, and generally asking what stinks, but they all either go over his head or he simply doesn’t care.

I’m at a loss. I think he’s an awesome guy that’s great to spend time with, but he has to do something about his hygiene.

I think that I have to seriously confront him about changing, but I’m worried that will destroy our friendship. Is there a respectful way to mention this to him while also making myself clear?

Nobody wants to be told they stink, but I think that’s exactly what I have to do.

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