A Singaporean girl recently posted online on how her father advised her to choose a guy that loves her the most instead of choosing the richest or the most handsome guy. She also states on how she actually dated rich guys but she believed that what her dad said was actually true.
Here is the full story.
Having been through a few relationships, I can say I have dated a few different “types” of guys, who had different personalities and came from different backgrounds. They were all awesome guys who taught me a great deal of things in life and made me a better person. However, I was immature and ended things as soon as there were issues in the relationship.
Last night, I had dinner with a few of my colleagues and one of them was telling us how smitten he is with his new girlfriend. We were excited and happy for him but what he later said to me really baffled me. He encouraged me to consider dating one of my admirers at our workplace, who has just joined the office a few months ago and apparently he’s good looking and also a high income earner. What baffles me is the fact that this colleague who asked me to date my admirer clearly knows that I am attached.
As much as I wanted to just punch him in the face, I tried my best to resist that urge and told him that this admirer of mine is not my cup of tea. The truth is, yes, I do find this admirer very good looking and he would always buy breakfast and afternoon snacks and drinks for me without even asking me if I want them but I’m not interested in him at all. Yeah it sure feels good to have eligible guys giving you attention but it doesn’t mean I have to date every eligible guy just because they are eligible.
Maybe I’m too arrogant but I think there are plenty of eligible guys around if you look hard enough in the right places and thus it is not a big deal to meet one. Perhaps it is my friendliness that attracted them and so they are keen to get to know me more. But I really don’t think it is a big deal to receive attention from them because I think it is not very hard to give someone a little bit of your attention, especially if you are interested in them.
Personally I think the best relationships are those that blossomed from friendships. At least this worked for me for my current relationship. My current bf is actually my younger brother’s longtime friend and he would often come over our house to play video games. I remember 2 years ago, I just ended a relationship and I desperately wanted someone to talk to. Whenever he came over, I would ask him to play video games together because I needed some form of distraction and then he would offer to listen to me talk about my problems.
Almost everyday we would spend hours texting on the phone until late night. On some days when I say I feel really down, he would cook my favourite food for me and then listen to me talk for hours. Whenever I fell sick, he would cook porridge for me and accompany me to the clinic. Whenever we go out to eat, he would help me order food because he knows exactly what I want to eat. Even I myself would always forget to tell the stall to not include spring onion in my food because I don’t like to eat them but he would always remember to tell the stall to not include them.
For my birthday, he asked me what present I want and when I said I don’t need any present, he learned how to make origami and gave me a big box of origami unicorns because he knew I like unicorns. For my brother’s birthday, we went to a chalet with some other friends and I fell down when we went cycling. He offered to piggyback me all the time because I was injured. I had never thought of him as a potential boyfriend because he’s 3 years younger than me but at that moment, I felt like I’m the luckiest girl alive and I wished he would piggyback me forever. I decided to tell him how I feel and eventually we started dating.
As I had little savings, I often find it hard to get by with my low salary and worst of all, the company I was working in ran into financial trouble and I was retrenched as a result. While I was trying to find a new job, he offered to financially support me by giving me $300 a month. My older sister was still mocking him behind his back for giving me just $300 a month. Of course, it would be easier to date rich guys because I could probably ask for $300 easily and this $300 would probably mean nothing to rich people. $300 a month may not sound like a lot but to a 22 year old undergrad who only earns $900 a month for his internship, it is a lot of money.
On top of that, he still had to give his parents allowance because his parents were old and retired. It is not how much you give but how much of what you have that you give. Now that I have already found a new job, he still continues to offer to give me a portion of his internship salary whenever he does a new internship, despite me reassuring him that I no longer need help with money. In the past, I have dated guys from wealthy backgrounds but honestly I have never felt so happy before.
Yes we would often dine at fancy restaurants and I would receive luxury gifts from time to time but nothing beats having a nice home cooked meal prepared by someone you love and a box of origami unicorns that took countless nights to make and most importantly, the feeling of knowing that someone is willing to give you all of him despite knowing that this would mean having close to nothing left for himself. And I wouldn’t want to risk losing all of these just for a few fine dining experiences and a few pieces of italian leather.
If there’s anything that my dad taught me about love, it’s “don’t choose the richest or smartest or most handsome guy, choose the guy who loves you most”.