When is it that you decided to quit?
I am asking those who have been through divorce.
I have been married for 2 years, no kids. I feel like I have acquired a new status – Mrs. but didn’t get much more from it except more responsibilities and blame.
Both my husband and I married late. We are in our late 30s and he is the only male in a traditional family. We didn’t want kids but his parents have been pestering us for grandkids. I was also expected to do all the housework and help out during festival and celebrations. My MIL still have those traditional believes that woman married into the family to help out (cook and clean for the family) hence I will be expected to go over and help out whenever needed.
My husband is kind of a mummy boy who inherited all the traditional thoughts but not the responsibility behind those thoughts. He is not the sole bread winner (I pay part of everything) but I am the sole home maker. He doesn’t do anything except wash his own plate after meals, sometimes he leaves his cups around and I have to wash them when I do housework during weekends. I told him if he doesn’t help out, I will want to get a helper but he say he won’t pay for the helper and hinted it’s my job to clean.
The worst is when his mother blames me (for working hence no time to make grandkids) he keeps quiet. When his mother expects me to go over when I am sick he didn’t fight for me instead say it’s just for a while. Multiple times I was used as the shield (excuse) for the shit he did and his ego. I told him that I don’t like him putting me down in front of others but he seems to think it’s part of my role as a wife to defend his pride.
Whenever we argued, he will deny everything he did and then spin it around to put the blame on me. Else he will cut me off halfway. There’s no way to communicate this way.
Honestly, it’s like a got promoted to Mrs. On the surface but deep down its a demotion. Got more things to do and care about and doesn’t gain anything from it. My love and patience with my husband is really drying out…
I am really contemplating a divorce. I kinda missed my singles day.