telling my wife she is my type after she bashed my taste in women?
I adore my wife. She is the best thing to ever happen to me and I can’t wait to start a family together. She is also an absolute knockout in the looks department (and knows she is).
Whenever the subject of ex’s or crushes or just talking about someone I had previously said I thought was pretty, she starts unloading on them about their looks. How she can’t figure out why I’d ever think they were attractive or that she doesn’t understand my taste in women.
This went on for a while and I never said anything because I truly don’t give a f about any of those people, only her. So what’s the point of sticking up for someone not relevant to my life? But eventually, it started to bother me. I started to feel like I was being insulted because I was ever interested in these girls.
I eventually spoke up and explained that when she’s relentlessly bashing these women, it actually makes me feel bad about myself.
Like I’ve never been with a beautiful woman and my entire dating history is disgusting. Sure, not every girl I’ve dated is a smoke show, but that wasn’t really relevant to our relationships or why they didn’t work out.
She is objectively correct about some of the exs being average or below average, but several of the them are objectively gorgeous.
It always puts me in a rock and a hard place because ultimately it doesn’t matter because they aren’t in my life and all I want is a happy life with her. But there is part of me/my ego that wants to resist because it feels so disparaging and belittling towards me.
We talked it out and she said she would stop. It never really stopped, but I just avoided the subject or agreed with whatever she said when the subject came up. Until today, when the subject came up again.
We were reminiscing about the first night we met. She had come to a bar with another guy who I thought she was dating. One of our first conversations was about mutual friends and I asked if she knew a brown haired girl that worked at her company that was cute.
Fast forward to years of dating and marriage and we can’t remember the girls name while reminiscing. We gave the ol’ Facebook a snoop and found her.
She goes right back into the bashing routine. How she can’t believe I thought she was cute and she will never understand my taste in women or my type.
I finally had enough and casually dropped, “well you’re my type so you’re grouped in with the rest of em”. She flipped out, left me at the cafe we were at and has basically given me the silent treatment for the last 24 hours.