We need to start the thread called AIM I THE PROBLEM(AITP) since there’s already a AITA thread in reddit.
My husband is someone non confrontational, meek if u want to call it, nice guy to make it sound better and generally soft spoken.
I on the other hand am the complete opposite, im loud and not afraid to confront, nice girl too i need to add this. I wasn’t raised to be like this so I believe it’s because of how he is I had to “woman up”. I became protective and fierce, I became his voice even if necessary.
18 years together n he has never once once stood infront of the auntie who pushed me aside just get ahead of the line and ask her to F off, not that I’ll ask her to F off too but telling me to live and let live and said I’m overreacting instead. But maybe it is my fault because he knows I can handle it all own my own, maybe he thinks I’m capable of throwing hands so he just need to stand back n watch since I’m so “independent”.
So an incident happened recently and it made me rethink my marriage. Rethink our 18 years. Perhaps enough is enough, perhaps I just need someone to take my side.
A friend of ours raised his voice at me because he assumed I did something but my husband was the one who did that something. I was shocked, embarrassed and pissed he would talk to a grownass woman that way. I proceeded to calmly yet curtly addressed the situation without getting all worked up and when he realised it was a misunderstand that said friend just bashfully smile n retreat. Not even an apology.
We reached home I asked my husband why did he do that. Why didnt he 1. Ask that friend to stfu n don’t talk to me in that tone 2. Didn’t even admit he was e culprit who did that thing and just kept quiet the whole time. He laughed in my face and ask me if I’m okay, the incident was hours ago and it was “nothing”, that friend was just talking he didn’t even raise his voice n best, “nothing to admit what”.
I flipped because he said I’m overreacting. I’m OVERREACTING when that friend raised his voice at me and the room went silent. It was awkward but nothing to my husband.
I woke up today really thinking about the life we have, am I able to continue living with this man who likes to be in the shadows of his peers, who prefer to be unnoticed and unheard, who rather let his wife fight her battles, whose food is served wrongly but when the waiter ask how r things he smiles n says GREAT. What is so great about a grilled dory when u ordered steak?
Am I the problem though seriously?
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