My [32/m] wife told me she only sleeps with me to fulfill her duties as a wife [31/F]
My wife has suffered with anxiety her whole life. She has done a lot of work to manage it as well as medication. I understand that medication can have an impact on libido. So, I have learnt to dampen by own libido to help support her. We maybe get intimate once or twice a month and this has almost always been the case for the last decade.
The other night She cried and revealed to me that she has only sleeps with me in the past to fulfill her wifely duties. She does enjoy it when it happens but is never truly comfortable due to her anxiety. She told me that this is something she is working on and that I should ask for it whenever I want it. In the moment, I said it’s fine because she was crying and I wanted to support her.
However, I now feel disgusting. I feel as if I’ve done something wrong by enjoying sleeping with her while she has been forcing herself to do it with me. I now feel like everytime I try to initiate, I am doing something wrong and terrible.
I know she meant well by telling me, but I don’t know how to get past this feeling. I think I am also starting to resent her a little bit and I hate that I am feeling like this.
I don’t know what to do or what to say to her without her feeling terrible about what she has told me.
Sorry for the rambling. Any advice?