I’m starting to find my friend selfish and self centered. I used to be able to match her timings to meet until I changed to a regular 9to5 job.
She gets annoyed when I suggest to meet for a weekend breakfast or lunch instead of dinner because she doesn’t wake up till 2,3pm.
She would meet me in full make up even when we go to a neighborhood mall. And she’s always late. Sometimes an hour late even when she live 10 mins walk away from where we are meeting.
I have night classes and exercise classes to go to so I cannot accommodate meeting her at night anymore. She works odd hours, irregular days and she likes to stay up till late, sometimes till morning, even when she’s not working.
I know she’s not a day person but I don’t understand why can’t she accommodate once or twice when she wants to meet?
When we meet she would order too much food, take a bit from each plate and I have to try to finish the rest as I don’t like to waste food.
Moreover we go dutch each time as I don’t want to be calculative with her. I’m starting to find that we have more and more different views in life as we get older. She’s still spending like a teenager at age 30.
I’m seeing a guy for a few months and she’s been very judgemental. She thinks I should pick someone with a higher status or higher paying job.
The first thing she asked me about my bf is what does his parents do and what type of housing he stay. I still can’t forget the way she sneer when I said his parents owns a food stall. I used to be able to ignore and put my foot down but her behavior is starting to wear me down.
I started to meet her less as I spend more time with my bf. She noticed and confronted me. She broke down and claim she lost me as a friend the moment I got a bf.
I don’t understand her. I’m sure she will also mia if she’s not single. She don’t even want to try to get to know my bf and straight away look down on him. Of course I will give our friendship space since she is reacting this way.
Am I in the wrong for choosing to spend more time on my bf and other friends? Sometimes she make me feel like I owe her a friendship for the years that we’ve been friends.
10 years of friendship is not easy to maintain and I’m glad to have her but she’s really starting to wear me down and I’m starting to notice she has not grown after all this time.
No desire to self improve, no desire to save for the future, only care about status, only care about looking rich. Hate women who are younger than her.
Complain about being fat but does nothing to lose weight. Complain about aging but does nothing to take care of herself. Never self reflect why she’s still single and only end up having short flings. She never rejects when a man shows interest.
I’ve talked to her about this and find it alarming she doesn’t know she has a choice to reject. So far none of her relationships lasted more than 2 months. Isn’t it a sign that she has problems identifying red flags?
I don’t know how to help her anymore.