Quick background. I (F32) and my husband (M30), together for 12yrs now, have been financially independent of our families for 10yrs now.
During the period when we were depending on our families, we were on the brink of poverty.
We built a good life for ourselves, and we make every decision together. His father and mother are divorced. Father checks in every 6 months or so. He tends to loan money from us and never give it back. Started with $20, $60. Says he’ll give it back in a week, never does. Then loaned 400eur, said he’ll bring the cash within a month, never did, stopped talking about it, and we never asked for the money back – it is my husband’s father after all. But now he’s asking for 2k.
Claims he owes his dentist, and that he’ll repay us in 4 months. I don’t mind helping family. But…
- I feel like he’s lying to us, he had his teeth done 2 years ago, and we have the same dentist, so we know that’s been paid.
- I don’t mind family saying “hey, I can’t return the cash, can we forget the loan?” but I do mind them pretending nothing ever happened and just not mentioning.
- In my mind, there’s a point and a number that’s too much, even for family, and 2k eur, on top of everything else we chose to let go of… Well, that’s the number for me. Either we lend him the money and he repeats the same routine, or we ask him to give it back, and it seriously strains my husband’s relationship with his dad. Or, we don’t, tell him we have our money locked up in the bank, and that’s it. My husband believes my judgement on this one, and I’m leaning towards just saying no.
What should I do?