SG work life: How to deal with a colleague who is only mean to you?
At my workplace, there’s this person whom obviously didn’t like me. Her tone to me is always very bad. She was rude to me as well.
It’s very obvious because I overheard her talking to other people, her tone is different. She’s just obviously being mean to me, and I really do not know why.
It’s like she just “kan wo bu shuang (see me not happy)”. I didn’t even do anything to her.
Anyway, I’m new to this company, about 3 plus weeks into it, thus I didn’t have an account of my own yet. Due to this reason, I had to use other ppls account to do work.
And today I happened to use her account. When I was about to use her account, she stopped me and said “I don’t feel comfortable with you using my account. Use other ppls account.”
Another scenario was there was this time I had to ask her some things, and she’s like “what?” in a very inpatient tone.
I have been tolerating her since the beginning. But today it was just so bad that I really broke down and had to run to the washroom to let out the tears to destress.
I know work is like that, there are all kinds of mean people. But I really do not know how to cope with it. I didn’t want to cry today, but I just couldn’t seem to handle it well.
It just feels like the accumulation of tolerating her for the past weeks just suddenly burst out. I really do not wish to cry again at work. It affects my productivity and focus.
Please provide some tips/opinions… :((
Netizens’ comments
Before I dive into this, I just want to clarify that I’m currently serving as an NSF (National Serviceman) in the SAF, with a vocation as an ASA (Administrative Support Assistant), which is essentially what most people would call a clerk.
In the SAF, we rely heavily on OSNs (Operational Support Notebooks), which are our work laptops. When I first joined my unit, there was a shortage of OSNs, and we couldn’t bring our own laptops due to sensitive information concerns.
So, as an NSF, I had to borrow OSNs from others to get my work done. Unfortunately, there was a guy who didn’t really like me. When I asked to borrow his OSN, he unsurprisingly declined, even though he wasn’t using it at the time.
So, I had to resort to what I like to call the “nuclear option.” I informed my Senior Manager that I couldn’t perform my tasks because I didn’t have access to an OSN and requested an extension on my work deadline, citing the OSN shortage. Naturally, my Senior Manager asked why I hadn’t borrowed one from the NSF who had an unused OSN.
I explained that I had asked him, and he had refused. My manager was not pleased and confronted that NSF, ultimately reassigning the OSN to me. This resolved my problem, and I didn’t encounter the same issue again.
In my case, I had a good relationship with my Senior Manager, and I openly discussed my concerns with him, as it directly impacted our work. This proactive approach helped me find a solution. I’ve learned that forming alliances in the workplace and waiting for the right opportunity to address issues can be an effective way to navigate tricky situations, especially when dealing with individuals who may not be the most cooperative.