Recently a woman shared her heartbroken past relationship story on Facebook.
She once dated a multi-millionaire in the past but felt that her ex-boyfriend didn’t love her enough and was only there for sex and only giving her material needs.
Here is her story,
“I’ve been so sad with so many stories about girls pursuing materials in a relationship rather than core values of love & kindness. However I kinda understand their perspectives because I used to be in the same situation. So I decided to share my story when I dated an ultra millionaire for 4 years and broke up 3 years ago. Alert: Pardon my loose writing or any grammar mistake because I was writing it at 3AM in the morning and really typing it out of my stream of emotions.“
“We knew each other from college (first year I think). Back then my family was so poor that we only lived paycheck by paycheck, and if I hadn’t earned the scholarship we would have never been able to afford the tuition. There were times that my parents had to secretly skip their meals because they did not have enough money to buy food for the whole family, but they lied to us that they had to go on a diet for health purposes. Typing that story now made me cry….”
“My ex boyfriend, by contrast, came from a totally different world. His family is one of the biggest tycoons in his country and has lots of businesses (retail, real estate) across SEA. Growing up, he never has the concept that people can be so poor that they cannot buy everything they want, and he can’t understand why my parents were so poor, why I did not have money to buy my own clothes and always wore the give-away stuffs from neighbors/relatives, or why I had to send money back home to support my family when I started working. I did not know his background when we first dated, and that was the best time of our relationship because the love was so pure & full of love, respect, and optimism. I remember on our first date, I bought him a KFC ice cream then we sat on the street and talked about our dreams for hours. He was so kind and gentle, did not care about materialistic stuffs at all, only wore an Uniqlo tshirt, flip flop and never talked about how rich he was.”
“Then things changed when he started to hang out with a new groups of friends from his class, who would casually buy a Rolex on a Saturday morning because they were just bored or when someone gave them the Angbao with full of cash (to indirectly bribe their parents). I guess when they spent hours per week only talking about how much money people have, how to spend money, or how to define themselves with money, he would inevitably change.”
“And then he started to shower me with money. He took me to Europe, US, flying on business class, dining at all Michelin-starred restaurants. He bought me luxury bags, clothes, shoes, and everything he thinks a girl should need to show her class so that I can be comparable to his friends’ girlfriends (silly, IKR). He even paid half of my tuition and literally financed me for 2 years before I graduated from uni. At that time I felt so good because (1) I removed the financial burden of my family and (2) Luxury does taste good at first. When I looked back, I was always grateful for what he did. Without him, I couldn’t finish my bachelor, explore the world at such a young age, and develop my cultured self & sophisticated taste later on in life.”
“Things were getting bitter after we graduated and had to face real life problems and face our huge differences in life values. Firstly: friends. I never enjoyed meeting his friends. Those convos were always about who got a new watch or who had more expensive houses. And they clearly looked down on me because of my background. He did not like my friends either, because to him, if they’re poor and did not bring any networking value or business opportunity hence my time with them was a waste. He said we should not care about emotional support from friends, that’s nonsense…”
“Second difference: family value. All of his friends and their parents publicly cheated but their partners cannot have a say because they’re financially dependent and well, he said, that’s pretty normal. Having a mistress is a badge of honor in that circle, whoever got a hotter/more famous mistress would have a higher score… I was like WTF how can you agree with that, then he said well it’s the privilege of being rich: you can buy whatever you want, be it a marriage or a mistress and using money to control people is the best feeling. He said don’t worry he still loved me the most and would never cheat on me, he did not care about other prettier girls but who knows…During our last six months together, I could tell that he no longer listened to me when I was sad or got problems at work, we did not have meaningful conversations anymore, when we met he only needed the sex and then we headed out to 5-stars dinners or went shopping for luxury items. At that point I refused to take those gifts and offered to share the meals. :)”
“I guess I did not need to say no more…it’s enough already to explain why I broke up with him. Though I was still poor AF at that time, and leaving the comfortable life was not an easy option. But deep inside me, I respected myself so much that I could not stand being in that life where I got no emotional support, no love, no respect from his friends & family. I could not stand being with someone who only cared about money and can only give me money. It was such a sad life.”
“I was depressed for 2 years after I broke up, because I was always feeling that I’m not enough. Even now, I’m earning 200K/year and can afford to buy my own Rolex (but I don’t buy it cuz I don’t like it), inside me there was a voice screaming that I’m nothing compared to him, I’m so ugly compared to his friends’ mistresses, etc. I know it is such a toxic thought to feed my soul, but the trauma is really deeply ingrained… I have to see a therapist to work on this problem. ”
“So girls, it’s nothing wrong to dream of a rich boyfriend but always remember there are always 2 sides of the story. If you date a man only because of money, you’ll end up having nothing other than money. That means you will not have anyone pampering you with monogamous love, care, and respect on lonely nights. If you date a rich man and you’re not wealthy to the same level, all of their circles will think less of you. It’s really hard to live in that world, at least for me.”
“Now I’m having a much happier and healthier relationship with a guy who currently earns less than me, but income is not a problem to me cuz he has such a wonderful personality that I look up to (I was simply lucky when I got the offer, I even felt I did not deserve that job…. ) His family is pretty well off but he built his career on his own without spending a penny of his parents’ fortunes. He did not wear luxury outfits though his parents bought him a lot, because he did not feel comfortable with the fancy style. Before dating me, he mostly ate every meal at hawkers but always took me to nice places on our date nights. He heard about my family issues and never judged, and even love me more cuz he said I’ve been so brave to overcome many challenges to become who I am today. His family and friends love me, and they all value love & relationships over money.”
“And my last piece of advice: Never judge a man by his current earnings cuz career path and income are never in linear progressions. They can go up and down, as long as your partners always find ways to hone in their capabilities, money will never be a problem. Look at their ambitions, behaviours, and daily habits. Are they working hard, constantly learning and improving their skills? Are they humble and respect others’ different point of views? Are they loving, kind, positive about others? Are they selfish or always helping others? Do your friends and family love them? Believe me, those people will move mountains to make you happy with everything they have 🙂 “