I just found out that my husband (40) of 22 years next month has been living a double life and cheating on me (43) for the last 10 years, if not the entire time. And I am devastated.
I had no idea and not sure how I missed on ignored the signs and can’t wrap my mind around why. I just want to know why??
I found out he was cheating over the weekend and keeping a girlfriend on the other side of town for the past 5 years. I found he has a second phone, stored gifts from his mistress, has a key to her place, they have a dog, and found photos of other random women dating back to at least 2015.
It was a huge blow out when I told him I knew and he of course tried to deny it. I’ve asked him to stay out the house right now so I can process and figure out a way to tell our two wonderful children. They think he’s just away for work currently.
But I can’t understand. This man has never not treated me like royalty. We’ve had our marital woes, I’ve had several health issues, but he’s stuck with me through it all. And we laugh regularly, he’s been my best friend and biggest supporter in life and we’re still intimate.
He’s home at least 3 – 4 days usually every week and otherwise working or claiming such. The night before I was told he was out on a date in which he didn’t get home until early morning I now recall, he had just taken me out to a dinner show with one of my favorite comedians.
So why would he be cheating on me if he’s doing all this for me and why cheat for this long and be in a whole relationship if he’s also with me? I feel so used and also just angry I didn’t notice it yet others have. And our children he adores, how has he lived with himself keeping it from them?
He’s spent the past 4 new years with her, playing house watching “their” dog, went on trips. I can’t fully prove it yet and still putting pieces together but believe he snuck away to her after he dropped me off for a surgery follow up.
I’m just trying to piece it all together to understand and feel I can’t trust anyone around me since I’m learning many people on his side knew – he’s a perfect in-law with my family however.
Has anyone experience this is or similar? Why and how could he do this???
And how on earth was I this blind not to see it? What should I do no??