I am posting this to seek advice from those whom are married. Any advices are welcomed. I am a soon to be bride this October end.
My future in laws are a devoted Buddhist family. They are traditional as well.
I get along with my dad in law but not my mother in law. She have always disliked me, as i am an orphan. She said i am a mysterious person without a background. I grew up in an orphanage, and transfered in my teens to a home for youths. I moved out when i m 19 when i got myself a full time job. I do not know who are my parents. Besides my friends and my boss/colleagues, i have no one else in my life. When my fiance first brought me home, she suggested to my fiance that he had better find someone better with a good background.
Currently i m staying with my fiance 3 times a week, other days at my company hostel. Tonight i asked my mum in law, do i need to pay my respects to the ancestors ( they have the ancestal tablet at home) after my ROM which is next week?
Guess what is my mother in law’s reply. She said “as you wish, even if you dont pray, it’s ok ,because i already have a pregnant daughter in law with a soon to be coming grandchild. I dont need another daughter in law in my life.”
My fiance scolded his mother for that. My dad in law glared at her.
I feel very hurt and i cried in my fiance’s arms. So my background of being an orphan, means i am not welcome to join this family? I am a traditional chinese as well, if i never pray, i believe i am not part of this family. I can’t sleep thinking about this, and it’s 3am right now when i am typing this out. I find myself very childish crying about this when I am in my 30s already.
On the other hand, I am feeling very lucky that my fiance spoke up for me and glad that we are moving out after the wedding. I can’t imagine staying with his mother, even though his father and siblings are all very nice people.