The original post in this thread is about the worst decisions people have made in their lives. The OP regrets not dating in their junior college or early university years and focusing solely on academics. Now, they feel like they missed out on valuable relationship experience and are worried about being single for life.
Many commenters shared similar experiences and regrets about not dating or making the wrong relationship choices. Some mentioned lending money to relatives with gambling habits, marrying the wrong person, or making poor investment decisions. Others shared stories about not taking care of their mental health or not pursuing their passions.
“Lending money to a close relative who has a gambling habit. Our relationship was never the same again when they didn’t return my money.”
One user shared their regret about not quitting a job and career early enough, while another user mentioned not taking enough risks in their 20s. Several commenters also talked about the negative impact of social pressures and expectations on their decisions.
Some commenters offered advice and support, encouraging the OP to be open to new experiences and not to give up on finding a partner. Others suggested joining social groups, hobby clubs, or volunteering to meet new people.
“I know a friend who lent close to 30k SGD to the relative. The relative kept saying that he badly needs the money. He bought a house, rents cars etc but never returns the money. One day the relative asked my friend to take out a loan since the saving of my friend was almost finished. Thats when we realised it’s a never ending process of asking money. Now we’re not sure if he’ll ever return the money. Gambling or not, some people have a habit of borrowing money and never return.”
The thread also highlights the challenges of dating and finding a partner in Singapore, where the traditional expectations of academic success and career stability often take priority over personal relationships. Many users expressed frustration and disappointment with the local dating scene and the lack of opportunities to meet new people outside of work or school.
Some users shared their experiences with dating apps and the negative aspects of online dating, such as the superficiality and objectification of potential partners. Others mentioned the importance of taking the time to get to know someone and building a strong emotional connection before pursuing a relationship.
Several users also emphasized the importance of self-care and self-improvement in building healthy relationships. They suggested focusing on personal growth, cultivating hobbies and interests, and maintaining a positive attitude towards life.
“Somewhat similar but different experience for me, so I think it really shows that it’s all a matter of perspective.I got into a relationship when I was JC. We stayed together all throughout NS and uni. Married 10 years after getting together. Getting a divorce soon. I don’t see it as a mistake and don’t regret most of it, cos I feel that it’s made me who I am today. But there are times when I think about what it would have been like if I had gotten to date around in the “prime” of my 20s, cos now I have no idea what it’s like to date, and there’s a constant fear of another failed relationship. I don’t think you should be so pessimistic though, OP.
You might not need to put yourself out there through dating apps and stuff, but at least don’t close yourself to the many possibilities out there. For example, you might connect with someone really well at work – don’t let that stop you just because of the colleague label. Haha a bit too much history to share so I won’t go into too much detail. Trigger was that she was unfaithful. But it was only after that happened and we trashed things out, that I realised that there were bigger issues in the relationship that were being swept under the rug all this while. One of my bigger rationalisations was that I think I was stuck in the mindset of the 18-year old me when it came to handling the relationship, which was a problem as we both matured outside of the relationship.”