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Thursday, February 9, 2023
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3 MONTHS INTO RELATIONSHIP BF WANTS A LOAN FROM GF TO BUY A NEW CAR

to stay or to leave?

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firstly, i hope my post will be posted as i need advices.

im currently in a 3mths old relationship, let’s name him B (45yrs), PHV driver. his montly income is abt 4-5k minus off his rental abt 2.6k and the remaining is not enough for his own expenses. We had been going out and mostly im paying for the expenses.

recently happened 2 incident which make him feel irritated with me.

first incident, he wanted to purchase a new car, asked me to be his guarantor. monthly installment – $2.6k which is abt 1/2 his income. i told him it’s not worth taking up as it’s too ex. he ignored the whole day cos to him im pouring cold water on him, im being negative and not helping.

second incident, he forgo the car purchasing. now he wanted to change a new set of rim + tyre which cost him $950 but he doesnt have this amount. he asked me for loan, i rejected. i asked him to save up for it, he scolded me for saying this. again he ignored me the whole afternoon. end up he told me he went ahead to make an appt for changing. again he asked me if i can help, i rejected. and his attitude completely changed toward me.

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i wanted to ask him if he ever think of the future. i start to see no future with him, no matter how hard i try to accommodate, he’s not returning the same. im starting to wonder if i shall leave or stay.

please help me!

Here are what netizens think:

  • Leave. Only 3 months into a rs he can ask you for loan. After marriage, it’ll not be loan. He’ll be using your money instead – borrow and no need to return!
  • Isn’t it obvious? It’s only 3 months, Pls Run Faster before it drag to 3 years, 6 years, 9 years etc. You can be assured that once you loan him the first time, there will be no ending to it. Worst, from his attitude, he is not going to be grateful or even appreciate you for helping him out. Run Run Run
  • IMO, the fact that he would be willing to spend money on a vanity buy (the rims) with money he does not have should send off alarm bells. I am assuming he has done his homework on acquiring the new car but I am not sure the rims will add to his income at all. Living beyond his means will result in long term anguish.
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