My boyfriend gets frustrated with me when we get intimate and I feel like I’m taking it too personally. It has happened twice now.
Basically when we are doing it from the back, he pushes me slightly forward and I lean forward because he isnt really holding my hips. He gets frustrated because it’s not comfortable for him if I’m leaning forward too much but in the moment I’m not really aware that I’m doing it.
Regardless of the actual reason why he is upset, he reacts very suddenly and makes “TSK” sounds and exhales loudly (expressing frustration) and the first time he actually raised his voice at me and told me “Move over, oh my god” which made me cry.
I’m very sensitive, I know that. He isn’t violent. He just gets frustrated easily and that’s a huge turnoff for me.
Last night he made a “TSK” sound and exhaled loudly again. He wanted me to finish and started using his fingers on me. I told him I was close and to put it back in and he was trying but he had gone soft (I guess he was bored/tired of fingering and he exhaled during that as well, as if he was annoyed)
He couldn’t put it in and I leaned forward a bit, then he just got frustrated and I just straight up got up and told him it’s not gonna work for me.
He says it’s just him being “direct” and acting in the moment. I didn’t care, I told him I can’t enjoy it if he keeps doing this. I told him if I’m leaning, then to just pull my hips back and don’t make frustrated noises as it just kills my mood and frankly hurts my feelings and I think it’s inconsiderate.
He didn’t apologise and we didn’t speak the rest of the evening. Now I don’t want to sleep with him at all.
I’ve posted about the first time this happened and I’ve been trying to resolve the issue with him but it happened again.
I feel like he’s too focused on making me finish and doesn’t really know how to. I’ve told him all the things that I like and he doesn’t do them. He just resorts to penetration. Anyway that’s besides the point. Is this a big deal, has anyone dealt with something similar? How do I proceed?