Back when I was around 8 or 9 I had gotten curious about a lot of things, with reproduction being one of them. However, me being a child and not knowing much about search history, and the fact we only had one big family computer, I didn’t know how to properly act on this curiosity.
One sunny day my parents and sisters weren’t home and my brothers were asleep and I decided that this was the day.
I would see my first explicit image.
As I typed all kinds of synonyms into the search bar I quickly learned there was a filter on the results for children, but I also quickly learned to take the filter off, and I got to see a woman with her chest out. When I was done viewing them I quickly closed all tabs, played some Barbie dress up, and went on my way to my room.
Later that day I hear an argument in the living room. My mom is scolding my brothers. I was only able to make out that she was telling them “do not EVER do that on the computer” “what were you thinking??” “What if the girls(me and my sisters) saw??”. All the while my brothers were constantly denying it.
I quickly realised what was going on. I peeked my head inside the room and asked what was going on and my mom quickly told me “nothing”, and that I should just go to my room. This confirmed it even more. Knowing I had just dodged a bullet, I obliged.
My mom saw the search history and assumed my adult brothers were more likely to look up that kind of stuff than her angelic young daughters, and though I definitely agree that my brothers probably consumed that kind of media as well, I am pretty sure they were knowledgeable enough to actually delete their search history after.
I will never ask them if they suspected one of us, I will never know if they knew, but something in me knows they knew. I also know they would understand.
Do I feel bad they got scolded? Yes. Would 8 year old me do it again? Probably.
Anyways if you read this I’m sorry bros