I envy those people whose parents don’t need their children to take care of them. But since it has come to this, I hope to seek some advice.
Background story, my father has been self-employed and not very frugal w spending , but at least he is not alcoholic or mistreats the family so I’m grateful for that. He does not have much savings, cpf not much money other than medisave cos compulsory topup. My mom is rather frugal, has met the BRS for cpf so she is doing fine. She will prob ask for some token amt but she is reasonable so I’m not that worried about her. They have separated.
So, my father has been hinting that he is waiting for me to take care of him, which made me feel a bit stressed out.
I will be graduating by next year, so hopefully, I can get a job by then. I’m intending to get a resale flat, work for prob 3 years and try to have a family. I would like to be a SAHM for a few years before returning to the workforce. My partner will be able to cover for our expenses, but he is not getting 10k or those sky-high salary so we still have to be frugal.
My father has treated me alright, and since I will be working I’m not sure what percentage of my salary to give him. Like I need to save up to pay the loan and have some savings of my own to prepare to be a SAHM, so idk what to do.
He will most prob rent out my room after I move out too, so is it ok if I give him like 5-10% of my salary? And even though I can afford to prob give him like $300 a mth (I dont think I will earn alot, prob around 3-4k), that wont be enough if he decides to quit his job and rely on me 100%, I’m unable to support him completely cos I will have a family of my own. He even asked for a room in my new house so I can take care of him, I just pretended not to hear it.
With his current diet and lifestyle, I hope he will stay healthy, but if anything happens to him ofc I will try my best to take care, within my means. But just not now, this is making me so stressed. If I’m not intending to have a family, I really dont mind, but with my future plans this is going to be very difficult. I don’t even think there are enough rooms to accommodate him and my family.
Shld I just forgo my dream of being SAHM and just work so I can afford to give more money to my father??? Cos I’m really against the idea of him moving in with me. This may sound selfish, but I just want to start a new future w my partner, to start a family of my own.
To add on, I’m not the oldest child, but somehow the responsibility fell on me just cos I have a slightly better relationship w my father. Maybe I shld learn from my older siblings and ignore him so I wont need to do anything? But I’m also not that heartless so idk what to do…
I’m alrdy stressing out about finances before grad. Pls give me some advice, scolding also fine, cos I really dk what to do.