I’ve been slowly and quietly losing weight and becoming more active without telling anyone. 20kg down.
I (27F) have been obese most of my life. I grew up with a single mom who didn’t have time to cook so my grandfather would bring over fast food and snacks and I packed on weight quickly, and developed binge eating disorder.
As I put on weight I resented the way I was treated for my size. I was called an embarrassment. The boys in my class would physically grab the fat on my body and jiggle it and laugh. If I wore “unflattering” clothes everyone laughed at me. I’ve been rejected many many times for my size.
But I resented the idea of trying to lose weight because I didn’t want to give them the satisfaction of harassing me into becoming an idea body type.
I did become confident in my size. And I honestly stopped hating how I looked. But, I didn’t like that when I flew, i often needed a seatbelt extender. I didn’t like squeezing myself as close to the window as possible to make sure I didn’t encroach in my seat-mate’s space (I fly a lot for work- 20-30x a year, so this was a big issue). I didn’t like not hanging out with my friends if they were doing physical activities because I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep up and I’d embarrass myself.
So, I started quietly trying to lose weight. I started eating cleaner, making healthier substitutes. And in the beginning of this year, I started eating in a calorie deficit. By that alone, I lost 20kg.
Now that I lost that much weight, I am now physically feeling more capable of working out. Earlier this week I went kayaking. Today, I went for a really long walk, some of that through a hiking trail. And I felt great after both.
I was 157cm tall and 140kg at my highest. And now I’m 120kg. I’m still obese. I have a lot to go. But I’ve done this totally quietly and privately without telling anyone in my life. I didn’t do it for any one’s approval. But I did it for me, and I’m actually making great progress.
And I just wanted to share that because I still don’t want to talk about it with the people in my life (tho, they are noticing), but wanted to tell someone.