As a Singaporean man who recently got engaged to my Thai fiancée, I thought I had everything planned out perfectly. I had met her parents, received their blessings, and even agreed to a dowry of RM100,000 (approximately S$33,000) as per Thai tradition.
But little did I know, my world was about to be turned upside down when my fiancée’s mother found out that I was not a Malaysian citizen, but a Singaporean.
It all started with visiting my fiancée’s mother. She was excited to see where her daughter and to get to know me better. I was just as excited to meet her, as I had heard so much about her from my fiancée. We had planned a special dinner to welcome her.
However, as we sat down to have dinner, the mother asked me a question that caught me off guard. She asked me where I was from, and I replied proudly, “Singapore.” To my surprise, her expression changed, and she looked at me with a mix of confusion and disappointment. I could sense that something was not right.
My fiancee was translating to me: She then asked me if I was a Malaysian citizen, and when I said no, she got up from her seat and started pacing around the room. I could see that she was visibly upset, and I had no idea why. My fiancée tried to calm her down and asked her what was wrong, but her mother refused to say anything.
“BS not happy that im a foreigner” but talk here and there is want my money only
My fiancee was translating to me: Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, she blurted out, “How can my daughter marry a foreigner? We have a tradition in Thailand where the groom must be a citizen of the country.” I was taken aback by her statement. I had no idea that such a tradition existed, and I could see the disappointment in my fiancée’s eyes.
Mom then went on to explain that in Thai culture, the groom’s nationality is an essential factor in determining the dowry amount. If the groom is a foreigner, the dowry is usually higher, and in our case, it would increase from RM100,000 to S$100,000. I was in shock. I had planned and saved for the RM100,000 dowry, but S$100,000 was a significant amount of money.
I tried to reason with her, explaining that I had a stable job and could support her daughter, but she was adamant. She said that it was not just about the money, but also about upholding traditions and customs. I could not understand her point of view, but I couldn’t help feeling frustrated and upset.
So eventually I told her to F off and I tell her if her mother want to sell her daughter she can try Geylang or Soi Cowboy in Bangkok.