MAN GOES TO WORK AT A JOB HE HATES, LOST IN LIFE WHILE HIS FRIENDS ENJOYING LIFE

Lost in my early 20s

I am in my early 20s and I am lost. I am going to work every day without a sense of purpose. I am working overseas (due to posting) and I am very homesick.

It’s tough seeing friends and family seemingly moving on without you. I see my peers having the time of their life in university and peers around me dating whilst I am restricted by my job.

Being away also means drifting from your closest friends that mean much to you. Life circumstances placed me here and while I do enjoy some (not all) aspects of my job, I always wondered at what cost?

I always wonder what sort of life could I have had if I have taken a conventional route. My job gave me some form of financial stability but it comes at the expense of many intangible sacrifices.

Somedays I could not help but just feel helpless and lonely. I am just curious if this is common among many adults who are pursuing a career or even fellas who are studying in uni.

Netizen’ comments

1. The first thing you do when you decide to move overseas to work is find your tribe.
   You really can’t do it alone. Find new friends. Have multiple sets of friends. Sports is a great way to get to know people.
   It’s also very common to outgrow friends around your age. Some of them have kids or family – they have other priorities in life. Or maybe when they are growing their own careers they make no time to meet you.
   That’s why you need to find new groups of friends to enrich your overseas working experience.
   You always have a choice. Coming home isn’t a bad idea too if you got learnt enough at your current job.
2. OP, you just sound burnt out. It’s normal if you’re in a career with bad WLB. Without more details, it’s hard to give you concrete advice, but the general sentiment is that it’s not worth it, you should look for a less stressful job if possible.
3. It’s funny cos we are getting so many posts from people asking how to get posted overseas. Being overseas with your own space is a dream for many young Singaporeans. Here we have another side to it, homesickness. To be fair, I think homesickness is something many people would be willing to go through for an opportunity to work overseas.